Water the grass

I've been house sitting for over two weeks now on the premise that I was to keep the back yard watered. New sod had been put in a little over a month ago, and apparently it requires much watering as it all takes root. I have no problem with this, but every day save one that I've gone down there it's rained hard. Last night, half-inch-diameter hail came down. HAIL. Ah well.

Two problems there; First a light bulb burned out. Once I find where they keep the light bulbs, I'll replace that. Or the hallway can stay dark, I'm not too worried about it.

The second problem; I was in the other room when I heard a crash and then a bunch of loud buzzing at the rear sliding glass door. My first thought is the microwave oven on the counter there was posessed. When I took a look though, I saw that this wall-mounted pedistal-almost-sconce next to the rear door had come loose & fallen, hitting the power button to the vacuum cleaner right below it. So now I'm thinking up a nice explanation that sounds more plausible than, "Dude, the thing just fell man..."

So I had this party, see. About a hundred or so people showed up, and one of these people had this pet monkey... ya with me? Well, the music's thumpin and this damned monkey is dancing on the pedistal, right? And I guess the monkey was pretty in to the music, because just as Kajagoogoo hit that first "Too shy shy" line, the little guy comes down on the pedistal and takes it right off the wall. Total bummer. I mean, if I'd known that a bunch of hot gals would come running up to see if anything was broken, I would have been dancing on the damn pedistal! So anyway the monkey's owner says you owe them like a thousand dollars for medical expenses or some bullshit... Oh, the grass is looking fantastic out there by the way, bye now.

Yeah, that'll do.

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Jet, Cold Hard Bitch