AmFam.com

I'm trying to give you money. You should be happy about this. Is it just some Schadenfreude thing that makes you want to watch me squirm in the attempt or something? Hoop after hoop after hoop must be jumped through. Flaming hoops and flying piranhas snapping at my every move, only to be given a "Go Directly To Jail" penalty for some stupid unwritten 'rule' of yours, requiring me to start. All. Over. Again. Case in point:

>login - ********* enter
--login failed, incorrect username or password (Okay, this is where I fat-fingered it. My bad.)

>login - ********* enter

>thank you. how may i abuse you? - View Bill

>thank you. please log in.

>login - (Okay, so I realize this is one of those sites that won't work on any browser not branded by Redmond's Overlord. Close Opera and open Internet Exploder)

>login - ********* enter

>thank you. how may i abuse you? - View Bill

>thank you. You have one account with us, but i will require you to click on the one and only account number anyway, just because i can. select the account you wish to view. - click

>thank you. you have no method of payment in our files. to make a payment, enter account information first so that we have a firm grasp of your scrotums. select checking/savings account, or credit/debit card account. - credit/debit

>thank you. enter card type, number, expiration, bill-to address, ship-to address, and deposit fifty cents for acknowledging your existence. - type-n-enter

>thank you. now, here are your options: pay your regular monthly amount. alternatively, pay an amount three times as much, just for grins. alternatively, pay the full balance which is four times the monthly amount. alternatively, fill in the blank amount. - monthly

>thank you. i'm sorry, but credit/debit cards can only be used to pay the full balance. to return to the view bill screen, click here. - (I am NOT making this up... :sigh: ) HARD-CLICK

>thank you. please log in to continue.

>login - (Wha--? No fucking way!) use the browser history to go back to what looks like the 'view bill' screen

This continues on, far longer than it should have. Paying a bill should not require more than four screens:
Login
View Bill
Enter card information in one screen to pay bill
Logout
Okay, maybe a fifth screen in there to confirm you didn't enter Donald Trump's credit card number. He can't afford my insurance bill.

Still, I am truly amazed that anyone can remain in business with that kind of pathetic and frustrating web presence. I guess they still have enough non-web-savvy folks that pay their dues... So I will definitely be dropping this insurance provider at the end of this six-month stint & going to someone else. I suppose I could drop them now, but at the moment I just don't want to go through that particular hassle right now. November cannot come quickly enough though.

---

Guru, Feel the Music